How A Mysterious Gift Made Me A Better Network Marketer…
Yesterday, I got a bulky golden package in the mail. Normally, that wouldn’t even raise an eyebrow. I mean, I order lots of stuff.
But this was something that I did NOT order.
Naturally, the first thought that enters my mind is “Anthrax”. You know, because I’m a completely rational human being, right? Of course I am.
Obviously, with no regard for my life (it could have been a bomb!) I ripped it open and was pleasantly surprised to find a brand spanking new ten-dollar pocket book written by one of my favorite authors.
Sent to me by a complete stranger!
Gosh, my pearly smile just about cracked my head open.
When the “buzz” wore off, I noticed a short typed personal note inside with a signature I couldn’t even try to read…
It wasn’t a fancy 14 page sales letter. It was just a note saying “I thought you would enjoy this book.” Nothing gimmicky, and no sales pitch at all…
But here’s what really got me…
I knew this guy from his products, I even gave him my mailing address for free information one time, but he was basically a complete stranger and he sent me a book, without asking for anything in return – not even a sale.
But what happened later that night is even more interesting…
Being a completely rational human being, I went to his website and bought EVERY product he has for sale, why? I’ll tell you…
It’s because he earned my trust.
He knew enough about me to take the time and money to send me a book he knew I would love. So, I took the time to buy everything he had for sale.
It’s classic marketing psychology at work…
You see, he spent ten (maybe twenty bucks with shipping) then I basically gave him a large chunk of money as a thank-you.
Yeah, I bought stuff from him, but if he didn’t send me that book, I would never have got around to it.
Besides, I felt guilty.
But so few people take the time to even think of their potential customers, or prospects…
You know this is true…
Because in our industry we talk about “recruiting” like we’re building an army or something… we talk about “traffic” like people are trucks… and we talk about “conversions” like we’re a cult…
It’s downright scary some of the words we use…
But when it all boils down, we’re an industry built on people and relationships. And I don’t care what religion you are…
Because the religion of Network Marketers is lending a helping hand…
Thinking of others before yourself…
Anything else is a misguided attempt to get rich quick.
Now, I would like to ask you to share these words on Twitter by clicking the green “Retweet” button on the top of this post.
But, I think you’re really the best judge of whether or not this message is worth sharing with your friends.
Thank you and have a great weekend. 
Your friend in success,
-Jason The “Better Networker”
-The Jason Better Blog
53 Comments
Dwayne Huggins on April 2nd, 2010
Hey J
Give first receive later.
NM, when we first get into it we are sold the end story, so that is what we want. We are never sold the rocky road to get to the promise land. This could be a big part of why we are more thinking about what’s in it for us instead of what can we do for others (could also be a reason for the 97% failure rate).
The guy who sent you the book set a great example to follow and he obviously struck gold with you. So by default you also have set a great example.
Have a great Easter J
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:22 am
It’s also a perfect example of reciprocity at work.
Good old fashioned marketing psychology…
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Matt Cassity on April 2nd, 2010
Hi Jason,
This is so true if we were to just take the time to invest in relationships we could gain so much more in return.
Thanks Again for the story!
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:23 am
I guess, you could say “give and you shall receive”.
Not preaching, but man, that’s a good marketing philosophy.
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Matthew Pedler on April 2nd, 2010
Hey Jason,
wow that was a smart move by that marketer. Not only did he make some sales directly through you, now he has you advertising for him!
Big lesson here,
Really proving the point “give and you will recieve”
Have a great Easter,
Matt
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:25 am
A lot of the mail order type… old fashioned marketers are like that.
They know that it’s an investment in a future customer.
Have a fantastic Easter too Matthew.
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Hector cuevas on April 2nd, 2010
Classic.. Great story J,
Just like mike says: “give without want and then you will get”
Talk soon,
Hector
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Ana YourNetBiz on April 2nd, 2010
I find it very interesting that with all attraction marketing information out there these days, so few folks use it in their businesses.
If they did, we would not be so blown away when somebody sends us a gift “just because”.
Best,
Ana/YourNetBiz Attraction Marketing Cafe blog
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David Wright on April 2nd, 2010
Awesome post Jason.
Sometimes the gift can be a simple compliment.
Now I know you’re not a cartoon 
, so maybe you can share further on human psychology… did you ever wonder what you did to get the gift or what he expected in return? If not you, use another example
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:28 pm
Hey David,
I’m sure he expected a sale some day in the future.
But picking out a thoughtful book like that is more than a free gift.
It shows that somebody really cares about the people they interact with.
I don’t know about you, but when somebody goes out of their way to get you as a customer, and I mean really goes out of the way, you feel really good about spending more money with them.
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Pablo Gonzalez on April 2nd, 2010
That’s “Attraction Marketing” at it’s best! Giving someone a personal touch, even if it’s not related directly to making a business profit, gives a person what they need, a sense of relief that you ARE a real person as well and that your true intention is to help and not to take advantage. Great post Jason!
All the best,
Pablo
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:30 pm
Hey Pablo,
It truly is.
And I think sometimes what people call “The Law Of Attraction” and “Attraction Marketing” meet up.
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Tommy DiPietro on April 2nd, 2010
Hey J-
I have been practicing this method for many years. So to add value to this post, I am going to share “What’s Working Now” for me;
I learned this a few years ago from a Real Estate Agent that did it and I’ve heard different examples from time to time. I buy my D&D coffee on my way home from work and use the drive through. Ever once in a while, I would pay for my coffee and pay for the person’s coffee behind me and the guy at the window would give the person my business card. After doing this about 5 times (cost me about $12), a made a sale and a commission of over $250. At that moment, I gained his trust because
• No one has ever did that and he was taken back by the nice gesture
• I was a member of our Chamber of Commerce and that was valuable to him
• This curiosity lead him to my retail site that had my personal touch and he connected with that.
You would be surprised you can touch someone in a positive way.
BTW- You did an excellent article in WWN, read it this morning on my bus commuting to work. The convenience of having a USB plug and my netbook. 24 hours left, my question, how r u going to drive that car?? Lol, jk!
For all that celebrate, have a great Easter!
And an enjoyable weekend,
Tommy D.
“The Prospecting Hero”
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April 2nd, 2010 at 1:01 pm
Now that’s what I’m talking about.
Tommy, you’re a living example of how to it right.
I’m a coffee addict so that would be DOUBLY effective on me.
And thank you for the compliment.
Although the car would be cool.
I have seven of them in my garage…
Kidding.
But that’s a toy.
I’m more partial to work.
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Dan Johnson on April 2nd, 2010
So that’s why my inbox is full of Free ebook offers? Do they hope to lay a guilt trip on me to buy them out? LOL
Great post by the way, more marketers should realize that you need to give in order to receive.
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April 2nd, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Hhah…
Well, that used to work.
Now that everybody is doing it… it works almost as well as yelling at people or spamming them.
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Amy on April 2nd, 2010
I LOVE this topic! Giving is what makes the world go ’round…
Have you all read ‘The Go-Giver’ by Bob Burg and John David Mann? If not, I HIGHLY suggest it… it’s about just this… it’s a quick easy read and extremely powerful.
Jason, should I send you a copy?
Thanks as usual for more outstanding content!
-A
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:31 pm
Awesome Amy,
I will have to Amazon those and get them this month.
Trying to make more time for education, reading, and personal growth.
Instead of running around like a chicken with my head cut off. 
I would love to accept gifts, but have to decline.
If I had my address out there with my name on it, my office would be swamped with groupies. lol.
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Madiba Thompson on April 2nd, 2010
You rock Jason I think that’s a big issue a lot of people just do this industry to get people in, instead of truly wanting to see who they can bless for the day. At the end of the day this industry isn’t about our comp plan or super galactic ultra supreme product, it’s about people helping people. Remember while prospecting people want to know this and this only “what’s in it for me!”
Thanks for sharing and keeping it real.
Helping you build your business while living life…
Madiba
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:33 pm
Who was it who called it
WIFM ? Everybody’s favorite radio station!
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Ginger Hogue on April 2nd, 2010
What a smart marketer. A much better approach than pitching. He did his homework, found your hot button and sent you an offer you couldn’t refuse.
We could lean a lot. Thanks for the post
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:35 pm
He most certainly did.
Clever fellow.
You know, I try to learn from everybody I meet. And what amazes me is how often I buy from people who aren’t traditional guru type “experts” but give me an excuse to buy, like this guy did.
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Jerome Ratliff on April 2nd, 2010
Great story J…
Trust really does have an impact on our decisions. I did something similar for someone, I’m not going to say the book b/c it’s a special thing I DO.
Anyhow, a few days later I was blessed with a little gift. It was such a great feeling, especially b/c I wasn’t even expecting it.
So, yeah trust does make a HUGE difference.
Have a rockin’ weekend,
Jerome Ratliff
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April 2nd, 2010 at 12:36 pm
It’s almost magical.
I mean, I could buy a ten dollar book.
I could buy hundreds…
Man, I even have a pile of novels I haven’t had time to read…
But getting a gift when you don’t expect it.
Now that’s magical.
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Rebecca Geiger on April 2nd, 2010
Well This was an interesting read…
I never put my finger on why my business (mlm) never took off for me. WOW. This was the reason.
I touch people all day, find out what their wants and needs are and how they feel about them selves. Who they REALLY are , who they are related to, who they then send as new customers because of how I make them feel.
Then I joined “a business” opportunity and lo and behold they uesed those exact terms… and I learned the “lingo” and you talk like them. To fit in, to be heard and to understand.
I did not realize that that was what was bothering me about it. The terms are terrible to place people into those “groups”… all the while
I felt icky about doing it.. and resisted doing anything in my “business”
I think people get the impression that it is easier to look at the dollar and not the person holding the dollar. All the while being told to market to the dollar.
WOW. Jason. Illuminating!
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April 2nd, 2010 at 1:06 pm
I’m like a spotlight now?
What amazes me is how hard it is for people to do the obvious.
Sending something thoughtful is way harder than it looks.
This guy sending me a book, might not seem like much, but think about it. If he did that for every customer he’s practically handing out ten dollar bills – and the funny thing is – he’s getting it back with loyal buying customers.
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Wayne Vassell on April 2nd, 2010
Hey J,
Some Great Morals there, we have to make sure that we do think about the people we recruit or “convert”, you are right.
It is easy just to focus on stats rather than people.
A great lesson to taken from your post.
Have a good weekend.
Wayne Vassell, signing out…
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Gayle Buchanan on April 2nd, 2010
Morning Jason
I got two free books in the post yesturday and both of them are awesome. First thought was, well done, they took the time to remember me – now that’s taking care of a customer. PS I already have all their products, so will be bottling the feeling I had and paying it forward.
Happy Easter Break
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April 2nd, 2010 at 4:31 pm
It feels great, doesn’t it?
They say that giving is better than receiving but sometimes it’s nice to get.
Have a great weekend.
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Derek Alvarez on April 2nd, 2010
Hi Jason,
I think the cool part is that it worked even though you knew what he was doing.
I used to buy a group of Realtors some donuts and stuff like that when I was selling landscape designs — and it DOES work.
Or even with my wife — buying her some flowers or writing a note will go a long way…
Didn’t cost a lot of money or require a lot of effort, but it’s the thought that counts.
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April 2nd, 2010 at 4:33 pm
Shhh…
Don’t tell her that.
You want her to think you spent all day picking those flowers and meticulously crafting the note.
But totally, I’m not blind to marketing psychology because I live it… but it still works on me.
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April 2nd, 2010 at 4:42 pm
Nice! Trust me, she knows, too — she let me in on that secret!
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April 2nd, 2010 at 6:31 pm
They’re all mind readers.
This I know from experience.
Jonathan on April 2nd, 2010
Jason I have to commend you, your content is fresh , helpful, consistent and your blog is successful. Yet you still find the time, unlike allot of marketers to respond to your visitors.
Excellent My friend, true class.
Jonathan Sweeting
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April 2nd, 2010 at 6:32 pm
Hey Jonathan,
I try…
There may come a time when it’s not possible any more.
So I understand when other marketers can’t.
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Susanna on April 2nd, 2010
Hey Jason,
Great story! That’s awesome you went and bought all his stuff. haha I have a buying problem too.
Does anyone think maybe he didn’t send that with the expectation of getting some sales…?
Happy Easter!
Susanna
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:43 pm
Happy Easter Susanna.
I think it came from the heart with maybe the hope of future sales.
And it made me buy…
That’s for sure.
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fred on April 3rd, 2010
I rember I read where Todd Falcone would send
a pie to a doctor with one piece missing ,then he would put a note in the pie box ,if you wont to
know what is missing give me a call .He said that he had a very high percent of call backs ,I thought that was a gerat idea .
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April 4th, 2010 at 9:34 am
Nice.
I knew a Graphic Designer who used to apply for jobs by sending a melon to his clients then a week later he would send the melon scoop with a note that said “Here’s the scoop” and explain the whole thing. A little bit of creativity goes a long way.
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Ilka Flood on April 3rd, 2010
Great topic, Jason!
Reminds me of how I joined my last company. Several people invited me to join. These were all people I knew already.
But this one person, a complete stranger, won me over. He sent me a box of Brownies for my birthday which totally floored me, and a couple of months later he sent me an awesome book about NW. He didn’t have to do this, as I had already told him that I would join. But because he did, it showed me that he’s a Giver not a Taker.
Giving starts the receiving process.
Have a great Easter!
Ilka
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Harold Hutchinson on April 4th, 2010
It’s not really a “gift” of value that you give away unless you treasured the possession of it for yourself. Giving away something you couldn’t use is charity and it will be perceived that way.
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April 5th, 2010 at 9:30 am
I never thought about it that way.
But now that you brought it up, it makes perfect sense.
I know some of my most treasured possessions were gifts given by people who treasured then first.
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Kylie Doak on April 30th, 2010
Hi Jason
I LOVE your writing style! (clever wit will get me every time ).
I was laughing so much from reading the first few sentences that I had to go back and read some again! lol
Isn’t it amazing how good it feels to be on the receiving end of something nice? I love doing nice things for people because I enjoy seeing how it makes them feel which, in turn, helps me feel good.
As I read your story, I actually wondered (as did Susanna Hess, above) whether he simply did it as a no-strings-attached nice thing to do.
Who knows … either way it was a win/win for both of you.
It’s nice to be nice.
~ Kylie ~
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April 30th, 2010 at 9:34 am
Definitely a win win.
I’m still grateful for his thoughtfulness.
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Hey Jason,
This is a great topic! Especially for this weekend. Now, I don’t you were going to take a spin with this and say that the guy came knocking on your door for payment.
I’m a big believer in giving to others as it will be done to me. Thanks because of my business I learned this.
So I’ll go share this post with the world.
Have a Happy Easter my toon…That’s cartoon!
Josh
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:12 am
I wish this had an edit button. Meant to say…Now, I taught you were going…
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April 2nd, 2010 at 10:21 am
That would have been something…
But no, just a friendly gift.
And what’s with everybody calling me a cartoon these days?
Haven’t you seen “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?”
Cartoons are people too.
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